HOW TO HANDLE YOUR EMOTIONS
As there is such a wide array of emotions we deal with, Ps Phil focused on handling the emotion of anger. If we can learn to control anger, we will find we are empowered to control all our emotions.
Anger is just one word used to describe a wide range of emotions from ‘irritation’ to ‘rage’. Within that range is annoyed, exasperated, heated, argumentative, contrary, wrath, mad.
So many marriages, families, partnerships and friendships are ruined by moments of anger when people say things to wound each other. Once anger starts it’s so very hard to stop. Anger begets anger. When people vent, the effect remains days later. Angry words have a way of getting stuck in our soul.
If we are to ever succeed on the outside and hold on to that success, we have to master the art of ruling our spirit. Taking a city is no small task, but the person who can rule their attitude will also be equipped for taking a city.
However, the person who is unable to rule his spirit will find themselves vulnerable, without walls. Their boundaries of appropriateness are broken down. The the entire city is vulnerable. The ability to learn, to heal, to communicate, to handle business, to govern, to police, to educate, entertain, is all affected.
"Whoever has no rule over his own spirit Is like a city broken down, without walls." Proverbs 25:28
We are moved to action by emotion. If they’re healthy emotions we’ll do good things which enjoy positive results. If we are moved to act on unhealthy emotions we’ll do bad things which which will bring us a harvest of ugly results.
"The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, And his glory is to overlook a transgression." Proverbs 19:11
"It is to a man's honor to avoid strife, but every fool is quick to quarrel." Proverbs 20:3
It is to your honour when the transgression is against yourself and you overlook it. People will think well of the person who obviously should be angry but refuses to be.
The Bible says we are fools when we allow anger to rest in our heart. We nurse a hurt to our own damage and reap a harvest of physical, emotional and mental disease. When we have allowed ourselves to be angry people, we stir up anger wherever we go. The wise resolve the anger. They deal with it. They get over it. They forgive the person and refuse to get stuck on the point.
In Genesis 4, we hear the story of Cain and how he chose to respond in a situation that caused him anger. After God did not accept his offering, Cain's response was to sulk in anger and rejection.
In Gen 4: 6 - 7, God said to Cain "Why are you angry? And why has your countenance fallen? If you do well, will you not be accepted? And if you do not do well, sin lies at the door. And its desire is for you, but you should rule over it."
Acceptance was offered to Cain on the basis that he does the right thing. He is warned that sin (Satan), desires to rule him, but if he chooses he can rule it. It is an opportunity for good or evil. The situation demands choice.
Cain maintained his relationship with his brother, but evil was in his heart. In the field, where they worked, he murdered Abel.
If we have nursed a hatred for a person or people then that hatred effects our dealings with people on a daily basis. Conversely if we love one person or people, or God, we will find ourselves loving those we have never met, covering their wrongs because our ability to empathise has flourished in an atmosphere of God's love.
"For the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God." James 1:20
Being angry about something is not going to make it right. Anger does not produce a God result in other people. Being angry with them is not going to help them change.
We sometimes think that if we are harsh and angry with people they will behave better. This is rarely the case. It just produces more anger in them. Also, often it is simply us ‘venting’ our anger rather than actually dealing with the matter at hand.
The worst part of anger is that it not only destroys relationships, it will also prevent you from fulfilling what you are meant to do in life. Moses was not able to enter the promised land after he acted out of anger, striking the rock God had told him to speak to.